


What a Sight For My Eyes

by diamondot



Category: The Expanse (TV)
Genre: Accidental Cuddling, F/M, Huddling For Warmth, Pre-Slash, Season/Series 05 Spoilers, Vignette, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-25
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-15 22:22:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29690814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/diamondot/pseuds/diamondot
Summary: He swims back to consciousness just before dawn. He’s sleepy and warm and holding someone in his arms.Peaches,he thinks, and crashes back to reality.
Relationships: Amos Burton/Clarissa Mao
Comments: 4
Kudos: 30





	What a Sight For My Eyes

**Author's Note:**

> This starts after Amos and Clarissa escape the Pit and ends up on the Roci. I've only seen the TV series and this isn't meant to be particularly canon-compliant! The title is from "Reasons For Waiting" by Jethro Tull. Enjoy, and thanks for reading :)

They bed down in an empty barn for the night. There’s no sign of any livestock, but the animal smell is still strong. Clarissa curls up against Amos under the blanket he pulled from the wreckage of the house, her back pressed against his side, her head pillowed on his outstretched arm. He’s keeping watch for this soft woman, soft like peach fuzz, who could kill him in an instant.

She won’t, though. She’s a good person. He’s not a good person, and he knows it. He knows he does bad things, wrong things-- but it’s an intellectual knowing, and it doesn’t stop him. He doesn’t feel right and wrong in his gut the way Peaches does. Or Cap does. Or Naomi. He needs someone to point him in the right direction.

She presses closer again, seeking his heat against the winter chill. She’s shivering. He shifts onto his side, careful not to move his arm, and wraps his body around hers.

***

Erich agrees that they’ll leave for New Hampshire in the morning. Amos refuses to leave her side, insisting that they’ll share a room for the night; Erich shrugs and makes a snide comment. Clarissa ignores him. What matters is that they’re going to get off the planet.

Amos sits in a chair, indicating with his entire being that he won’t be moved until morning so she had better just take the bed. She cleans her teeth and washes her body as best she can, Amos respectfully turning his back.

“This bed is big enough for two, you don’t have to sleep in the chair.”

He glances at her, his attention on Baltimore’s wasted skyline. “I’m fine, Peaches.”

“You haven’t slept in two days.”

He shrugs. “Gone longer without sleep.”

“Come on, Amos. If you sit up all night, so will I.”

He looks at her, bemused. “Are you tryin’ to get me into bed?”

“Yeah, to sleep, you asshole.”

The corner of his mouth twitches. He looks at her a minute longer, his expression mostly blank. Without a word he gets up, lies down on the side of the bed towards the door with his back to her, and to all appearances falls asleep immediately. She smiles to herself and lies down, feeling something like contentment next to the warm bulk of his body.

***

He swims back to consciousness just before dawn. He’s sleepy and warm and holding someone in his arms. _Peaches_ , he thinks, and crashes back to reality.

He’d meant to stay in one position all night-- he usually doesn’t move much unless he has nightmares. But he rolled over in his sleep and Clarissa is there, her head on his shoulder and her hand resting on his chest. She’s still fast asleep, her breathing deep and even.

Amos can’t remember the last time he woke up holding someone he hadn’t paid for the privilege. He prefers to keep his sex life separate from everything else-- it’s just easier that way. But from here he can see the five white hairs growing at her temple and the fine lines at the corners of her eyes and he doesn’t want to move. He wants to pretend for half a minute that he’s the sort of person who can wake up in the morning with someone to hold.

She stirs, breaking his reverie. He lets go immediately. She blinks her eyes, realizes where she is, sits up quickly. “Sorry,” she says.

“‘Sfine,” he says, and means it.

***

She wakes up in the middle of the night, struggling against the restraint straps on her bed, not knowing where she is, heart pounding. She takes a deep breath and tries to calm herself down. She’s on the _Rocinante_ , not in the Pit, and this is the cabin that she claimed for herself.

She tries to go back to sleep, but it’s hopeless. She undoes the straps of her bed and puts on her boots, her feet taking her to the kitchen without consulting her. She tries not to think about the nightmare of concrete cell blocks and medical restraints dogging her heels.

Amos is there, a bulb of something warm cupped in his large hands. He looks up at her when she slides into the room, offering her a small smile. “Hey, Peaches. What’s got you up?”

She tries to smile back at him, just about manages a half of one. “Just nightmares,” she says. “I couldn’t get back to sleep. What about you?”

He shrugs, takes a sip of his drink. “Wasn’t tired yet.”

She makes tea and sits down next to him, their shoulders only just brushing. They sit in silence, but it’s a nice one, she thinks. Comfortable and warm. She wants to lean into him, the way she did on Earth when they were trekking through the Chesapeake forest in the snow, but he hasn’t touched her since they arrived on the _Roci_ and she hasn’t asked. But it’s still nice to sit next to him, to know that he’s real and solid, because maybe then so is everything else and she won’t wake up back in prison.

She finishes her tea and thinks that maybe she could fall back to sleep now, so she says good night to Amos. She’s proud of herself for only hesitating a second before putting a friendly hand on his shoulder. He looks up at her, his face unreadable, and nods.

She’s at the door of her cabin when she hears footsteps behind her. “You know,” he says, leaning one shoulder against the wall, just visible in the corner of her eye, “if you can’t sleep… I mean, if there’s anything I can do to help, let me know.”

She meets his eyes. His face is serious, almost solemn. She raises an eyebrow at him. “You trying to get me into bed, Amos?”

A real grin flashes across his face at that, before the seriousness returns. “I dunno yet, Peaches. I do wanna hold you though, if you’ll let me.”

She looks at him a minute longer before taking his hand and leading him into her cabin, closing the door quietly behind them.


End file.
